The first time in 23 years...

At 05:46 on 17th of January back in 1994, a tremendous huge sound like bombing woke me up feeling a vertical drop. I couldn't get it what happened to me for a moment. And a few seconds later without getting what it was, fierce rollings started dropping all the items placed on the furniture over me. 

I strongly remember my father's shouting voice, "Protect him!", my nephew who was only 2 years old then. We just couldn't do anything to it while the power of nature which we need to awe the most in the universe was raging. 

Fortunately we survived from the Great Hanshin Earthquake. However what I saw when I managed to go outside, only darkness was there with dust smoke drifting in the air. 

"Holy cow!"

I went to the annual memorial service today for the first time in 23 years after the earth quake. I never kept looking it away as other people affairs. As one of the survivors, I'd just had to keep my life rolling until now. For me already as an adult at that time, the memories have never been weathered away. I easily recalled it moment by moment.

The risks of death was lower then compared to the epic center and the most disastrous area, but we could've been buried if our house was not build holding the neighbors' houses next to each other. It was an old wooden construction house in a local shopping arcade.

Now I start thinking about what to do for the next. Even though I don't have any particular goals at this moment, and I'm still alive. The Gods just keep me alive cause I still have things to do in life.

I just still don't know and see what it is...

My question is just...

"What is the next?"

Masami